clarinet neglect

Today I practiced my clarinet for the first time since I don't know when. It's hard for me to believe that it was just 8 months ago that I used to play anywhere between 4 to 10 hours a day. Now I can't seem to find 4 spare hours in an entire month.

And there's this tremendous guilt wrapped up in it. Being a clarinetist is something so central to my existence - it's a huge part of my identity. So when I'm unable to play for maybe 3 weeks at a time, it's like I've lost a part of myself; I'm a stranger in my own skin.

I'm willing to bet there are millions of people like me around the world - people who for whatever reason are unable to pursue the interests and passions that resonate with their very soul, whether it be painting, running, gardening, or whatever else.

I'm not going to tolerate anymore clarinet neglect in my life. When I find my next semi-permanent place of residence, I need to find more opportunities to play and perform, because  my   life    apart     from      music       is        just           hollow

poor clarinet. spends all his time locked up in a case. he deserves better.